Thursday, September 21, 2006

Mugsy addresses U.N.

UNITED NATIONS (The New York Times) -- In a move that sent shockwaves through the diplomatic community, civil rights activist Ayatollah Mugsy addressed the U.N. General Assembly on Thursday to call for the release of the so-called Oregon Five.

Barking via videophone, the leader of Pug Life Ministries struck a defiant tone in demanding the release of the five prisoners accused of being members of his Armed Revolutionary Forces (ARF).

"These canines are not members of the ARF. I demand that they be released at once," the cleric said to the assembled delegates. "One way or another, they will be freed. Either you are with us or against us."

He described their detention at a Eugene, Ore., dog pound as a blatant violation of the Geneva Convention. Officials in Oregon contend they have broken up a coup plot and call the Oregon Five a danger to the community.

The General Assembly chamber was abuzz over the pug ayatollah's address. He first made news at the United Nations in April with his infamous shoe incident.

In his closing remarks, Ayatollah Mugsy told the Oregon officials to free the Oregon Five and let him take their place behind bars.

"I am the one you really want," he said.

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